Thread: How good is it?
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Old 03-09-2013, 10:51 AM
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Helo Helo is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: California
Posts: 279

Originally Posted by SEcondary View Post
Why bother if there are so many problems.
Considering the widespread failure rate for marriages, rampant spousal abuse, high reported levels of unhappiness and dissatisfaction in a marriage, it would push me to ask the same question regarding monogamy.

It's whatever works for you. Monogamy is the majority (though I personally contest that, at least as far as people's thinking goes) but that doesn't mean it's the only blueprint for a relationship.

If I read this forum before my wife fell in love with her boyfriend I don't think we would have gotten into it.
This place, as has been pointed out, is often a place people come for answers when they're in pain. It ends up creating a big bloc of two post users who have massive problems that they have no experience dealing with, so they come here.

Are the rewards that great?
Fuck. Yes.

Getting into this way of life required making one of the hardest choices I've ever had to make in my life, hands down. It blew apart my social circle, I lost several friends, I have to be very careful who finds out about the way I live, and the dating pool shrinks exponentially.

Even with all that, it is THE single best personal decision I have ever made and I say that with no reservations and no hesitation. It has done more to make my life happy and full than any other single factor. I feel more like myself, I feel more free, I feel more loved, and I feel more capable of loving.

No guarantees your experience will be even remotely similar. Every person has their own story. If you want it, you've got to ask.

How good is it for the wives or girlfriends? Thanks
I would say it depends how you treat them. If you treat them like harem girls, I cant imagine it would be all that good.

If, on the other hand, you respect their individual needs, wishes, and personal sovereignty without trying to control or demand things of them, then I would imagine they would be fairly happy. If you truly love them as they are, then I see it being pretty enjoyable.
I am as direct as a T-Rex with 'roid rage and about as subtle. It isn't intended to cause upset, I just prefer to talk plain. There are plenty of other people here who do the nice, polite thing much better than I can. I'm what you'd call a "problem dinner guest."
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