Originally Posted by Livingmybestlife
I dont really understand howit went from no cohabitation to habitation, when this happened previously it was decided no cohabitation. It seems the signs were there and now he is getting cast the bad guy. I dont that is productive. It took all three to make this situation. Why was it okay for you to ignore something being off, why was it he didnt feel he could express himself, why was it that she never went to her place. It seems like those all need to be addressed. Even questioning his statement of being your other half when clearly that wasnt the case. I think being introspective and looking at each of your roles is important. While it may seem like all is lost. I think the very opposite. I dont think positive relationships can go forward without the posion being exposed and dealt with. While really painful now, it can be worked on and proceed. Jmop
Sure, it takes three people to tango, but as far as "why she never went to her place"?
* this was someone who has been there since the beginning. it isn't some unicorn they just picked up and can't get rid of now.
* this is someone who their children consider a third parent. Their kids call Girlfriend "mom" (or whatever name they use)
* last but not least, Matt said he INVITED girlfriend to stay for dinner, but ASSUMED she would leave. That's just dumb. Don't say shit you don't mean and expect that people will know you mean the exact opposite, especially when they're in a relationship with you (which you are planning on breaking off, but they have no clue about it) and have a history where they're part of the family even though they're not related by blood or marriage.
It would be a whole other thing if Matt hadn't admitted these things about himself. But at least we have the wife's story, and that makes it pretty safe to say that girlfriend didn't bring any of this on through actions or lack thereof on her own part. I've had this happen to me before, not in the context of an intimate relationship, but it SUCKS when you take someone else's words at face-value and TRUST them, then you find out not only did they lie to "protect my feelings", but the whole time I was there, they were hating it and wishing I'd leave and never come back.
That SUCKS. That is no way to treat someone, especially when they watch your kids for free.