Originally Posted by BoringGuy
So you're ready to go from inviting her to stay for dinner so she doesn't feel like hired help, assuming she'll politely exit stage left, to "nothing gets the message across like the cops showing up"?
You REALLY do need to work on your communication skills. Not your wife's, not the girlfriend's, but YOURS. There are more than those two extremes. That's no way to handle this.
I hope you learn and grow from this episode in your life, that is all.
No, no, no. Maybe I didn't convey that right. Let me rephrase it. My communication skills aren't lacking or unclear. If she's there, an invitation is extended. Not ever at my insistence. On my end, it's because of my wife wanting her around. She's there. We're cooking, and it's would you like to stay for dinner? Not one that has to be accepted every time. It's like when someone says, "Hey. If there's anything you need, let me know." Do people mean it every time they say it.
I don't want the cops showing up at my house. That was in a joking sense to lighten the mood. Everything doesn't have to be heavy all the time. Before it reaches that level, she will be banned from the premises. It's heading that way.
The hired help was in reference to her watching the kids until we get home. I should just say, "You did what you came here to do, and you can see your way out. We'll see you when we see you. Good bye." I'd even be a gentleman and open the door and clear the way for her to leave. That might need to be the approach. I'm too nice at times and probably roll over and accept shit when I shouldn't. That's my flaw.