Originally Posted by opalescent
Also I get why she was so supportive of your cheating friend. Cheating has an accepted place in our social narrative. [...] It is a far more accessible story of Wife A is miserable in relationship, she cheats (bad) but eventually leaves old relationship for new lover, they marry and carry on the usual monogamous life story (good).
Guilt also seems to be a big factor in the acceptance/nonacceptance decision. I'll bet that Cheating Friend flogged herself mercilessly, so the other friend didn't have to. In Other Friend's eyes, Cheating Friend's "moral compass" was pointing the right way, but she stumbled off the path.
), on the other hand, didn't stumble; you tossed out the "moral compass" (at least inasmuch as they feel it applies here) of your own free will. Hence the determination to set you back on the path, so to speak. I think she believes she is
being your friend, with the tough-love.
Good luck. I hope that time and (your) patience will get her to come around. I know that in my relationship, my partner has become persona non grata
among some common friends because they believe I'm being taken advantage of (I'm mono). I've heard of other success stories, though, so your mileage may vary - I hope it does!