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Old 03-02-2013, 05:56 AM
WhatHappened WhatHappened is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 831

Originally Posted by ValerieAOK View Post
. Even though it's wrong, it's not really hurting anyone. It's like pot smoking in my opinion. It might not be "right" in the eyes of the law, but it's not really hurting anyone is it?
Lying hurts the person being lied to.

Originally Posted by ValerieAOK View Post
I know this tactic of being "single" online will inflict some hurt if someone actually meets me, and I reveal the truth. But the profile its self is not hurting anyone right?
Well of course the profile's mere existence isn't causing any actual harm. If it just sat there and nobody reacted to it, ever, no harm done. But isn't the whole point of the profile for someone to actually meet you? Then they meet you and find out you're not single, and now there's a problem.

I was merely reacting to a stigma that society shoved down my brain hole. I over came that, and I have faith that most humans can do the same.
But putting this quote together with other things you've said, are you saying that if people don't want to date you because you're married it's just because of society 'shoving' ideas into their brain? And a smarter, better person will overcome that?

Please give people credit that maybe they really are capable of thinking for themselves and making intelligent decisions. There are perfectly valid and even good reasons for not wanting to date a married person. It's not merely a 'stigma.' There are people willing to date a married person for various reasons. Why not be patient while you look for such a person, and refrain from finding fault with those who want a different sort of relationship than you do? This is their right, and a valid desire, to want to date someone who's single and available for marriage someday.

You also used the words "I got over it" elsewhere. I wouldn't want to date anyone who took the attitude that they can lie to me because I'll 'get over it.' That they can lie to me to get what they want. I would feel that they'd really reduced me to a new toy that they felt they had every right to possess, by any means, simply because they wanted it/me, with no regard to the fact that I have wants and needs of my own.
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