Originally Posted by learninginTN
If we pursue the divorce and all the polyamory/open marriage stuff comes out, will we be in danger of having our kids taken from us? If this were a possibility, I would not even examine the idea of divorce.
You need to speak with an attorney and find out what the law says in your state. Here in CA this would be a non-issue, then again so is adultery. If she is abusive, you have an obligation to protect your children. You can't make these decisions without knowing the facts, so meet with an attorney and find out the facts.