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Old 01-05-2010, 04:30 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ravenesque View Post
While reading I felt a vagueness in one place. You and B spoke to each other yet you still seem uncertain. What are you unsure of and is it not something that could be clarified with further communication between you and B and A? Having expressed that you were jealous, were you also able to pinpoint and talk about the reasons behind the feeling?
Yes, there is still some uncertainty. Probably due to a lack of confidence in the situation on my part. Which is why I am on this site, trying to figure out the what and why in what I feel.

I was able to pinpoint why I was jealous. It was 2 parts, I felt very shunned after having sex with B and almost immediately being pushed away, and also felt jealousy because she continued to get emotionally closer with A and would not open up with me. I did eventually speak with B about this, and I believe I have this covered. A was very understanding and supportive because she did understand where I was coming from and why I felt hurt.

Quote:
If the three of you formed a relationship which had additional attributes to what existed in the relationship formerly, would the option of having other relationships, whether they be for flirtatious sensual play or emotional connection or both, be out of the question?
No, that would neither be fair to her or to us. In the same breath it wouldn't be out of the question depending on how the relationship develops moving forward. Hope that makes sense :S

Quote:
If you allowed the relationship to remain open in this way while you forged ahead together with the new developments between you three, would there be tension because of possible jealousy on your part or would there be ease because you would not feel you altered the original agreement but perhaps only enhanced it?
Good question, and I can't say how I will react moving forward. I am simply trying to work within the context of this new relationship. These are feelings I traditionally don't have and I am not even sure why I feel them now. I have always said I am not a jealous person, this has become the exception. I have a gut feeling I know why, but its hard to describe beyond, this situation if it worked out, would be like a utopia for me. Like others on this site, I have always felt like I was non-monogamous. While both my wife and I didn't lock ourselves into any labels, we both want the same thing.

I suppose our goal (myself and A) is to continue working with B and let this friendship evolve. Patience is a virtue that requires work for me. Luckily I have my wife their to support me and this site to be able to relate to other people.

thanks

Last edited by Ariakas; 01-05-2010 at 04:32 PM.
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