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Old 01-05-2010, 04:29 PM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Upstate New York, USA
Posts: 1,467
Default How we can all help

There are some for whom "big-A" activism isn't for them for whatever reason (some a question of real-world practicalities and others for whom that is not their "style"). It's easy to feel that we can't make a positive difference in our communities if we don't follow the big Activist Agenda. I'd like to suggest that there are many approaches and that one does not have to be automatically portrayed as in conflict with another.

I very much admire the Activitists who are willing to put themselves "out there" and on the line for social change - that takes courage. But not everyone is in a position to do that, but I do feel that these other people can make a positive difference to the poly community. This thread is intended for those what still want to try to make a difference in other, perhaps smaller, but just as meaningful ways, to talk about things that can be done.

Taking pages from the Jeff Foxworthy play-book:
  • If you have talked to one person who was cheating on their spouse and shown them that polyamory is an alternative - then you have made a positive difference.
  • If you have recommended one book to someone who was struggling to deal and it has helped them - then you have made a positive difference.
  • If you have met face-to-face with other poly folks and helped them see that they are not alone - then you have made a difference.
  • If you have joined an online poly group and have shared your real world experiences of having a poly relationship, so that others can learn (from your successes as well as your failures) - then you have made a positive difference.
  • If you have started a polyamorous community because there wasn't one that suited you, and gather a few people into it so that they have more poly-friendly contacts - then you have made a positive difference.
  • If you have told one person about a poly community that you like, and have recommended they join (, of course!) - then you have made a positive difference.
  • If you are in a healthy polyamorous relationship so that others can see that it CAN work without a lot of drama or people getting hurt - then you have made a positive difference.
This list is far from exhaustive, and I would love others to add in positive things that they feel could make a difference in our wide poly community - no matter how small these things may seem. My point is to show that there are many diverse ways to make our community better for the people who feel they belong to it, and I don't think that people should be shy or minimise these things.

It can be very scary and lonely, especially for those in rural areas or ones with anti-poly feelings. I feel that helping these people see that they are not alone, and that they are not wrong for their beliefs about loving more than one in an open and honest way, can go a long way towards making this a better community as a whole.

"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb
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