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Old 02-24-2013, 08:03 PM
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undefinable undefinable is offline
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: East of Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 33
Default sexless/asexual relationships

Wow, this thread has got me to thinking. This is all opinion, none of it is fact. I am not lecturing, its just easier for me to speak my mind in a very linear way. Plus I am not sure I understand my own positions fully, so if you disagree with something I said, please please please offer a counter argument.

First, relationships are not for outsiders to define. Nobody can stand on the outside, look in, and say "That is not a valid relationship for XXXXX reason." A persons interactions with another person is a relationship. Their goals, desires, and the purpose the relationship serves will likely never be fully understood by someone outside of it.

Second, sex is one of the potential components of a relationship, not the component. Many relationships lack in something that for me, personally, I would not go without. That doesn't make them less valid, or satisfying, it just makes them different.

Third, relationship is a catchall term, and many other specific terms just don't really adequately describe a situation. Adding labels is dangerous in this respect, because it assumes understanding of communication. There is no way I could possibly describe the relationship I have with my wife, or anyone else for that matter, in one sentence. So I say "my wife" and assume you understand "This is the woman I married, and she supports me emotionally, and we have bonded our lives together permanently, and we understand each other better than anyone else we have ever met, and I would do anything in this world to spare her pain, and I tolerate her family at times, and like them at others, and we are a good team, and I love her absolutely." No mention of sex in there, anywhere (Its amazing, BTW) but by stating she is my wife, it is usually assumed that we do in fact have sex.

Can a sexless/nonsexual/asexual partnership exist? Sure, I think they can. Do I have a desire for a relationship of this nature? Not particularly, but who knows what the future will bring. Would I ever be satisfied with letting someone else label any relationship I had with anyone else for their own convenience? Hell no.

Or, you know, maybe I have no idea at all.
Life is all about connections. Love is infinite. Spread the wealth.

Last edited by undefinable; 02-24-2013 at 08:06 PM. Reason: went on a bit of a grammatical adventure there at one point
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