PN is off visiting a friend on a neighboring island this weekend. Its the second trip of the year for him. He visited his ex-girlfriend a few weeks ago. That's a lot of travel for him! He seems to be embracing his life and seeking out what he needs. I'm happy for him and encouraging him to do what he wants by staying back and looking after the boy and life at home more.
We had our annual RP kick in the butt talk about the garden again. It seems every year I need to remind that we have a garden and that we need to be responsible for it. This year Mono wants to build up the garden and PN wants to move some things around. I am excited about my own garden project too. We await an arborist to come and deal with our fruit trees and then plan to get going. I am hoping this year we can keep it up until the fall. We decided to break the week down into chunks that we are responsible for individually. Hopefully that will help.
Brad comes home from China and Thailand today. Yipeeee. I missed our coffee dates the most. Its been awhile that we have gone to our favourite coffee shop hang out. I am hoping he wants to go there this week.
Derby and I went for a hot tub this week and then to one of our favourite restaurants. She has been very busy and it was nice to catch up. We seem to be in a position where we are concentrating on entirely different things. She is out and about, doing tons of exercisey things and socializing lots. I seem to be a home body, recluse that gets overwhelmed by crowds lately. Its made it hard to relate on some level... we are good together in that we just let go of all that and enjoy each others company.
Mono and I are doing really well. We seem to have some understanding of each other and are moving forward. I continue to work on letting my mind and being get into grips with the possibility that he could find another woman to love. I find that the time I now have is helping me adjust.
I put my mind into the space where I might have to welcome another metamour into my life through him and work on a plan that will sustain me. My plan revolves around going out and doing my own thing and leaving him to it. I will use that time to enjoy a level of freedom that I haven't had or wanted. It will mean I will be in a state of being alone on a level that I have not experienced yet. Mono and I are by far the closest of all my partners. We are bonded to each other's side in ways that I am not with the others. I intend to break that bond at that time and move in a different way than I have in a long time. At some point I will talk to him about that reality. We have in bits, but a full on conversation seems to be in order once I have thought it all through thoroughly.
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