Thank you, to everyone who posted, and let me ramble and try to sort out my thoughts and feelings here. It was a big help, and I really appreciate this board for all the great advice and support. I really can't thank you guys enough for the wonderful advice and feedback.
I wanted to add, later on last night when we talked a little more about it, he actually volunteered a timeline, said he's only planning on staying in his current situation 6-7 months, to just find a job, pay back his friend for letting him stay with her, and then move on. We decided our goal was to both be out on our own and independent within this time frame and that we will then assess what our options are for being together. Somehow having a time frame helps, makes it seem less like languishing in limbo and more like there's actually a light at the end of the tunnel, like we're both working towards something healthier and more positive and that things will be better soon.
And GalaGirl, I ordered that book, Non-Violent Communication. It looked like a really good read.
Last edited by Tamcat; 02-23-2013 at 04:10 PM.