Thanks...that makes me feel a bit better.
Confused, though...I heard back from the doctor yesterday, and all
my tests came back negative. Including HSV.
This makes no sense, because whatever that was (is...nearly healed)...it looked like a textbook case. Plus, as I said, my wife tested positive.
I've read in a couple of places that even after an initial outbreak, it can take weeks or months to show up in a blood test. So maybe that's it. I'll test again in three months or so, and see if anything comes back different. The nurse also gave me a number to the infectious disease people (sounds thrilling)...said they might have a better answer for me.
But what if the next test comes back negative? Do I just keep going every few months (I would be doing that anyway, I suppose, being in an open relationship now)? Do I assume
I have it in the meantime, and tell any potential partners?
Speaking of partners...ready to hang it up on M. My therapist told me 'not so fast', but we'll see (we talk a couple of times through email in between sessions - he's quite amazing in his openness to communication that way).
So, she never responded to my 'How about next week?' question I threw out a few nights ago. Also, on a whim, I asked her the other night if she wanted to grab dinner (I live an hour away, but commute for work...was staying in town at the last minute to see a friend's gig). She responded and said she couldn't - which was pretty much expected, since it was so short notice. But it was in the language. She called me 'buddy.' Hmm. Seems like both avoidance and
setting boundaries through the use of purposefully chosen words to me. But guessing kills, right?
I'm thinking that I'll just let it lie for a couple of weeks, then send an email (if I haven't seen or heard from her in that time), asking her if she has any interest at all in us going beyond 'friends'...keeping it as light as possible, of course. I don't wanna spook her by sending something very formal and serious out of nowhere from the laid-back, goofball guy she's known this whole time. Of course, I'd much rather talk to her in person about this, but she hasn't provided the opportunity yet.
So...technically it's not over 'til it's over...but it does feel as if I'm back to square one. Disappointing. Out of all the female friends I have, I would have placed money on this working out with M. I actually thought she would jump at a chance with me. Oh well. *sigh*