You summed up the hard questions I'm asking myself right now. Do I truly think I'm the poly sort and would be even if at some point in the future I was single or in a different primary relationship? I believe so, thought long and hard before bringing it up but would never know for sure until I tried it: sure it would be a difficult journey to take, could be a disaster... I wanted to embark on that journey however.
I am dissatisfied with some, not all, aspects of my marriage. We are in counselling, taking better care of each other, guess I have to give it a year or two to see if we can really make it work and thwn take stock. I think I'm totally getting my husband's pain but not very happy about such a binary choice or lifelong exclusivity or no marriage. He will not tolerate any otuside relationship, would leave immediately, also believes he'll never look outside and if he found himself wanting to, would leave. Will also not tolerate any contact at all with my friend, who I bump into regularly: I guess I just have to wait until I'm over him and it will get easier.
It's good to get this out!