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Old 02-17-2013, 02:04 AM
ThatGirlInGray ThatGirlInGray is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Northern Cali
Posts: 552

I think a lot depends on what is meant by them sharing "details". Are they bragging? Giving TMI? Or are they trying to share their life and the people who are important to them with their family?

Originally Posted by understanding101 View Post
particularly because we aren't apart of that world.
I don't think you need to be poly or open yourself to be aware and accepting of others being poly or open. If they aren't trying to convince you that they're "right" (which could be happening, and MAN I hate that!) then I would turn the question around to, "Why wouldn't you want to know who your family member is dating?" Do you not want to know if it's a single family member as well? If so, then you'd at least have a consistent basis (imo) for asking for no info.
I find it offensive and off putting.
I agree that you probably want to look at WHY this is offensive and off-putting to you. If you really truly aren't judging them (since you say you don't want to be judgmental) then why does it even matter to you what they're doing in their personal lives?

It's just so difficult to watch your family member and their spouse engage in emotional and sexual affairs, even though consensual. Not to mention be apart of their "lie" to other family members who aren't aware of their arrangement.
Okay, making you be part of their lie when you aren't comfortable doing so isn't cool. But why is it difficult to watch? What are you afraid will happen? I know my mom fears my kids being hurt. But as I've told her, the odds that my husband or I would fall for someone else while in a closed relationship are not that much smaller than while in an open relationship. Ultimately, if our relationship is solid, it will continue, regardless of what other connections we make. And by being able to satisfy our curiosity and explore other connections, we reestablish day in and day out that we are with each other because we WANT to be, not because it's better than being alone.
Pan Female, Hinge in a V between my mono (straight) husband, Monochrome and my poly (pan) partner, ThatGuyInBlack
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