I don't mean at all to bad-mouth your desire for written rules, boundaries, or other agreements, I am just wondering what it will ultimately give you. An agreement is only valid, where not legally binding, as long as both parties agree to uphold the terms of the agreement. In such a case it makes little difference whether the agreement was written or verbal.
The example you used of your ex is a perfect illustration. Assuming he was aware -and come on he was aware- of the mutually agreed upon boundaries, it was still a meaningless contract as it was based on an honor system with a dishonorable person. (Or at least someone who chose to act dishonorably) Whether written or verbal there is no guarantee of either partners behavior if, or when, one of the participants simply decides not to honor the agreement.
At that point the only thing you have is the possibility to pull out a document, point to section A. line 2.B. and call the other person a damn liar. While that might grant you a second of righteous indignation, it really does nothing to change the situation you are in.
I guess what I am saying is that, in my mind, there is no greater sense of security in a written document than there is in a verbal agreement. I could understand if someone lacked the capicity to understand what it was you were trying to express, but then would they understand the written contract if they were just that thick?
Last edited by polychronopolous; 02-16-2013 at 02:26 AM.