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Old 02-14-2013, 06:46 PM
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StudentofLife StudentofLife is offline
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Originally Posted by AnnabelMore View Post

I've been reflecting on the idea of our relationship potentially being a non-sexual one. I don't know whether she wants me or just sort of wants to want me. I'd never been able to fathom the idea of non-sexual romantic partnerships before, but now it seems more plausible. More plausible, at least, than leaving her life just because there's one thing we don't do together any more.

Hi Annabel,

This paragraph you wrote really caught me, and I wanted to toss an idea out there. If I'm way off base, I apologize.

If I understand correctly, you are the first woman Gia has really had a loving and ongoing relationship with, while for you F/F relationships been part of your life for a long time. The same is true of my girlfriend and myself. Because of her health, our relationship stopped being sexual quite a while ago, the same as with you and Gia's pregnancy and new motherhood. As time went on, that aspect of our relationship became more and more unreal to me. I know we used to be sexual, but now in my head it's foggy, more like remembering a dream than anything else, whereas sex with men still seems clear. I've read that neural pathways form with repetition. For me, 30 years of sex with men is ingrained, where sex with a woman for only a year is much more amorphous.

The idea of trying to get back to where we used to be can seem really daunting to me, like having to start all over again with something unknown. The challenge of something new instead of the resumption of something familiar, I guess. Is it possible Gia might be feeling something like that?
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