Originally Posted by NovemberRain
Sounds to me like maybe you should get upset on 'their' days more often, you'll get more hugs....
Seems to work for him.
(sorry, can't help the snark)
hahahha, I try to be the adult. (note the "try" part)
I was also glad to have an opportunity to point out to Airyn that I don't have any trouble speaking my mind to Chipmunk. Like me telling her what was up while stressy grabbing things to get myself out of the house. Sure something I take my time with, but not everything.
Originally Posted by Livingmybestlife
Mi am glAd ur getting clarity and more respect. Did u and she ever speak on monday. Sorry silly new tablet.
They had Monday and Tuesday this week. Monday she asked if I wanted to go thrift store shopping, I said sure. I was thinking she wanted to go just us so she could try talking to me in very public places. Then Airyn asked if I was going with them.
I told him I had agreed to go, but that I didn't realize it would be the three of us. HE APPOLIGIZED. It was not his mistake to accept the blame for. But then I had not directly told Chipmunk that I would not be going anywhere with them as a group (After how Things went this weekend I am back to that). I told him it was fine I'd that I'll be ok with it. We went out all three and shopped a several thrift stores. No confrontations, no angry eyes, no pouting. Just three people shopping. When we get done we drop everything off at the house, Airyn and Chipmunk leave to pick up Wolf, and Then Wolf and Airyn come see me in the bed room.
Wolf is all excitedly telling me about her day, and what not. I give her bed time hug and kiss and send her on her way.
Airyn sits beside me. Gives hugs, kisses, and we talk. Since we know our voice carry into the bathroom and to Chipmunks "space" we talk very quietly. He tells me that Chipmunk was happy with how the day went, and that he told her that we only have problems on days he's "with" me that normally it is he and I inviting her out and her pouting that causes stress, and anxiety. I nodded, and said that maybe it will make a difference seeing how it can be soo much easier when people are cool. (but I'm not putting any expectation on that idea) You know "lead by example". This was the first time she had invited me to join them when they are have "their" time. She did not get the guts to talk to me on Monday.
I have a very good Idea what she wants to talk about, and our conversation Tuesday did not include that.
I have a feeling that after the conversation Airyn and I (sorta) had in the kitchen that Airyn instigated talking to her about move out cost, versus saving goals. I told him when I was explaining part of what had set me off, that just watching the two of them "be" a couple together is enough to trigger me now. I have since figured out that Friday but me past my breaking point. With my MiL's help and some serious thinking Saturday, and long discussion with Airyn Sunday I have started finding my feet again.
For a long time there I was down and out, just agreeing to anything and everything. I told Airyn He and I had to break that habit together, we created it together. That habit had more to do with his not really listening to me, and me giving up on trying to be heard. He's trying to show me that he's taking our soon to be engaged status seriously. More about that at another time though.