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Old 02-10-2013, 11:06 PM
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fuchka fuchka is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 369
Default LDR looms

Sleepy. Stayed up late making slides for a talk that Ocean's doing as part of his interview process. It's in a small city in our home country; he's there now, and will be coming back in a few days.

It's a permanent job, starting July. If he's offered it, he's not sure if he'll take it. Part of the purpose of him travelling there is to check out the environment to see if he'd want to relocate.

The possibility of him moving became more real to me as I helped prep his presentation. He's good. He's in a shortlist of four people. This could go either way.

Grotto morose. He knows that I may move if Ocean moves. At this stage, I'm not planning to, but it really depends on how everything goes for him. If Ocean's happy, and enjoying himself, it would then depend on my work and priorities. But if I am still not rooted in this new city, and especially if Ocean's not coping too well, I'd seriously consider joining him.

There's no work for Grotto in that small city. He's loving it here and doesn't want to move. He's feeling fear of abandonment, feeling a bit of hierarchy (I'd move for Ocean but wouldn't stay for him?), butting against the edges of poly. Two of them, one of me.

Meanwhile, I still haven't found paid work, and have been looking elsewhere (other cities). Still don't need another income, but I want to feel like I've got something keeping me here apart from relationships. Well, I'm involved with quite a few things here but nothing I can't leave at a moment's notice. Makes me feel flighty. Like, why am I not travelling right now?
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