A Twice-Broken Heart Harder to Heal
So, I was on this site, some months ago, just trying to meet people in a similar situation as I. At the time, which now feels like forever ago, I had recenlty moved in (with my partner, C) with a mutual friend of ours, for whom we both fell, K. Three months in and all was blissful. Then, something changed... C confessed that although we went into this together and she was aware that I was in love, she really was not comfortable with K and I being together. Our physical relationships (on all fronts, since we moved) progressed slowly and this was intentionally the case.
When the very real possibility of me being with K was in front of us, C slammed the breaks. Now, K has fully admitted to me that her love and attraction for C was at first sight, and that she could see herself building a life with me, as well, but that she and I could not cross lines that she and C had not been able to, yet. We had talked about the three of us being physical and had agreed that it would be good to experience one another as a couple, first. Essentially, K was to have sex with C, before she could have sex with me, and only then would we all be able to have our "three."
Late last year, things started to happen without me and without my knowledge. I don't mean physical things, but (to me) more meaningful and emotional things. K proposed. C said "yes." Neither of them told me about this until I asked, having been clued in be some random conversation. I was floored. I was hurt. I was confused. It took some more time and some more cues, but eventually, I was done. Now, I am not actively seeking to replace them, but having shared this part of myself with two people, I feel like it is the kind of relationship(s?) I want and need. Maybe, they just weren't the right two...
Anyway, and sorry this is so long, I am here just looking for friendships, and perhaps something that will blossom into something more. I have been living as lesbian and my attraction leans towards women, but I am open-minded and feeling free to follow my heart.
I currently work full time in a library, but I am going to school to finish up pre-requisites to get into nursing school. The great part of this is that I have hundreds of options for where I might apply and end up. I love to travel and since I got out of the military (AF, for 6 years) I haven't done much of that. I have 2 classes (3 or 4 for some schools) to finish up and that includes the two I am taking this semester, so I could get started as early as the fall!
Well, that's my story. Oh, BTW, I live in central Arizona, so if anyone in the area (I am literally, right in between Phoenix and Tucson) wants to chat sometime, send a message.
I am actually planning on having a "Newly Single" celebration with some friends and family in a couple of weekends at The Rock in downtown Phoenix for anyone interested. We're gonna catch a drag show on 02/23. Not asking for strings or commitments, just a good night out to party!