Could tell your BF you ran into her and became aware of her upset/struggle.
Could tell BF that you are now aware that he hasn't been communicating with her about his relationship with you, and she's totally in the dark about a lot of important details.
Could tell BF that you don't find it morally sound for you to continue a relationship with a man whose primary partner disapproves of him seeing other women.
Could tell BF you don't like being the focal point of their relationship issues.
Could ask BF what he plans to do (if anything) about addressing his primary's upset/struggle?
If he plans to do nothing, you could choose your next behavior to alleviate your own need not to be worrying/upset over this kind of stuff going on. (ex: remove yourself from the relationship because of your objections above in blue and his lack of responsiveness -- not just to her need to be free of discomfort, but YOUR need to be free of discomfort too.)
It's pretty straight up.
Last edited by GalaGirl; 02-05-2013 at 03:44 PM.