Originally Posted by constlady
And for those of us with quite real concerns about the potential repercussions of not being adequately understood, this is the key.
I live in the smallest, most rural county in New York State.
It's a definite red streak politically and that conservatism runs through the judicial system.
If the law guardian of the children for whom I am currently legally responsible gets the impression from someone with a different definition of polyamory than I have that my lifestyle includes massive orgies or a constantly rotating cast of characters in and out of my life, I will be facing an uphill battle with the entire system in order to keep these kids safe.
It won't matter that their mother is an incarcerated addict - that's an understood disease, the system is used to dealing with that.
It won't matter that their father is a convicted felon and has also been found guilty of neglect previously - that again is a known enemy.
But let it get out that their grandmother is *gasp* polysomething and immediately red flags will be raised.
So these discussions on finding a definition, on being able to present to mainstream society a non-threatening picture that clarifies who I am and how I love have a very serious and very real potential to impact not only my life but the lives of four young children.
Personally, I don't wish to define how anyone lives their polylife, just as I don't want mine defined. But the reality for those of us who live under the threat of persecution is that there does need to be some sort of basic definition, not only for the outsiders to understand but for those within the community to rally around to remove that threat.
This! Any minute now 3 of GG's family members will be stopping by. His family is bound and determined that we are all "living in sin" and that we will drag our children down with us. They have already pushed for court battles to remove our youngest child from our home.
Additionally our second oldest-his mother and grandmother have also tried to remove him from our home (tried for 10 years).
It's very important in a legal sense that we educate the general population that there can be a CHILDFRIENDLY poly-lifestyle.
I don't give a damn how ANYONE practices their life. But when we can't define certain things-we put the innocent lives in the balance because the unknown causes fear and that fear causes condemnation and judgement and unnecessary and irrelevant legal actions that hurt our children.