Originally Posted by kdt26417
If only they would tell us about things like polyamory and asexuality when we were kids! It would save a lot of people a lot of heartache.
I really do wish that sexuality was more honestly discussed in school. So many people struggle with not knowing where they fit and wondering what is wrong with them, when it is really preventable. I get really frusterated when I think back to all of the time I spent in counseling, both alone and with my husband, trying to figure out a way to 'fix' things, and to 'fix' me. When the whole time there was nothing wrong with me. I'm just wired a little bit differently and have a different way of experiencing joy and intamacy with my partner(s).
Granted, Asexuality as an orientation only began being discussed on a large scale in 2001. And has only recently begun to be studied in acedemia in 2004.
So it's pretty new and I can't really fault my counselors for not knowing any different.
I began reading Opening Up
and have found it to be an invaluable resource for my husband and me to begin to discuss and explore this journey into poly-living. And although we do live 17,000 miles apart, we talk every day and we have been able to begin to talk to eachother about what (idealy and realistically) we both want from a future partner.
We know that there will be difficulties and stresses in developing a new triad, V, or polyfidelic relationship, but we also know that when we find the right person and we learn to be open and loving and compromise for the best within our new dynamic that there will be a lot of joy for all.