Jeeze, ya sure have been through lots. hope this guy realizes what you do for him. reading back just recently, youv'e put aside what sounded like good love with Lilly and Willow, and now something inside yourself but he has not seemed to change much for you and lied about the change he did make. How far back in his life does that go? i think some personality traits like can be like alcoholism. You can't heal unless you want that change iinside you for you. You can't do it for someone else and it can be a lifelong battle every day not to relapse. i know too well maybe.
Being new and reading blogs from beginning to end that span long periods of time is revealing. things repeat that you dont see when you live them day to day. As an excercise, go back and read your blog from the beginning... some theme s like deceit, getting caught and saying your working on it now and things will change, then going through it all again a few weeks later come up. i hope this time the change comes from inside and isnt just lipservice to your ultimatum that may end in resentment. theres good things too and you seem to find a lot of love in your life when youre able to accept it.
Been threw a few times when i loved someone but there were a couple of big issues that didn't work out. Sometimes one or both of us could adapt and it was okay, but there were a couple where it tore our souls apart trying to fit together something that was so so close but in the end just not right.