Originally Posted by eternallygreatful
Being in a relationship with another woman is very hard to do. Women are so overly emotional and can flip things around into something that they were never meant to be. All of a sudden, you are trying to help and you are made out to be the devil. I am looking for some suggestions on how to better connect in a female/female relationship because it was something that I had not done before I got together with my girlfriend. As far as relationships with men, sex is usually a suggestion for connection, but because of this new type of relationship, I would really like to know how to better connect with her in a non sexual way as well.
What I dislike, personally is when I am looking for help and being deceived. Saying one thing doing another, avoiding questions, and all-around waiting until the last minute to fess up when I have asked several times, you pretty much have to say it straight out. I'm relatively a straight-forward person, with limitations. I like talking about certain things, but if I refuse to talk, i expect for that to be respected and typically, have my personal reasonings behind why I refuse to talk. It's respect and honesty. If I'm mad at someone I will straight-up say it, I'm not for beating around the bush and sugar-coating it. And when I post things, like on here for example, if either one of MY partners tried to offer me advice, as if being an outsider to the situation and relatively making me look bad, because of how I feel, I would get angry. I agree than female/female relationships are difficult but you have to be open to talking things through, not being so rude all the time and being respectful and mindful of your partners likes&dislikes and emotions. I mean with my partners, I get moody because it's a tough situation. Loooong story you don't want to hear about, but anyways, I'm very tempermental and moody. And I apologize for it but it always comes back around to bite me in the ass. Always. Instead of seeking out why I feel the way I do, the demand I tell them as well as get mad when I decide for my own personal reasonings, logical or not, that I would rather just "think" about the situation in my head. because in fact, I could be wrong in my emotions. But they jump the gun and kind of bombard me and get angry when I refuse to talk. If I want to talk. I will talk. Point blank.
Likes. I like cuddling and being able to laugh. Watching movies and walking around at the park. I adore the park. I just want to be respected. And my biggest thing, I want my female partner, if she has children to be mindful that I will not always feeling like I am a mother to her children, because in fact I am not, and never will be.
The same would go to her if I had children and she did not and she wanted them. If I lets say had a daughter and my girlfriend did not and she'd miscarried the baby she wanted, she would feel left out of the mothering aspect of the childs life because in fact, her child is point blank, dead. Like mine, I have to accept I don't have my child, I never had those experiences with my child because I lost her. And I am the most emotional about that because of how much I loved her. And because my girlfriend is pregnant, it gets difficult to see her make it to the point that my body didn't, to make it to the point where she is able to prep for a child and I lost out on that. It hurts and being sexually involved with a woman who is carrying a child, healthily nonetheless, it becomes very hard to be able to feel and see the obviousness of a child being carried within her, and being too close to where the child will be born. I want to share the experiences that my "husband" and I should share with my "wife" but it gets hard because it has only been 6 months. It gets difficult seeing her have exactly what I want. and that honestly is mostly a deal breaker with my partner, because even though its not her fault and i would never wish for her to understand my pain, it kills me to watch her have what i have always wanted.
That's a little off topic, but that's just me. But instead, ask your girlfriend what she likes. Communication is key.