Thank you so much for the support! Please email more.
I think my post was unclear. My son knows everything. We told him about sex when he was five. He knows about masturbation,. condoms, what it means to be 'gay". He has met transgender people and we have talked about them getting hormones. He knows what a postitute is and, of course, porn. The only thing he is unclear on is abortion and kinky stuff.
I have told him that sex is natural. I told him that masturbation is OK. I, in fact, offered to buy him a girlie magazine.
Here's what happened. He has his own iPad with no child lock. He's a good self-editor so I didn't think of it. He grabbed the iPad from me - was hiding. He had googled porn out of curiosity and then got "stuck" he called it "addicted" He said he felt horrible about lying. He said I had "released him from a coma."
I feel like I came off as being conservative and I'm much much liberal than I know. BUT I do thing 10 yr olds looking at internet porn isn't ok. For me, porn is complex : very anti-feminist (very very) and violent in many ways. I see it as very different from girlie magazines or erotica.
I also do not really want him having sex until after 18. (Again, my personal preference) but I plan to impart this to him through discussing, not rules or pressure.
Yes, I guess people don't agree much. Does anyone else have conflicted feelings about porn or their own sexuality? Did anyone else feel pain in their children not being babies anymore? I guess I wish that I could be in a monogamous, highly romantic relationship. I guess I want that for my son too, but feel hypocritical if I tell him that, I guess that's where my confusion is.
KNOW THAT I AM NOT JUDGING. I don't care what anyone else does! Just trying to figure out my life.