Too Many Problems, Not Much Help and I need it! PLEASE
So while I am looking to UNDERSTAND how to take care of what is “wrong” with the relationship, Both, Sam and Glenn have referred to me as “demanding attention” and “complaining.” They tell me that I am “difficult to handle” and that I am “complex.” Glenn says he is a simple mind and that I am not and that he loves that about me, but when it comes down to it, with fights and issues and trying to get adjusted to the relationship, they refer to me in such a negative way that it pisses me off. Last night, was again another one of those nights. It didn't make sense why they had to go to my posts on here and why when they did they had to get on me for being one-sided.
I am NOT intending to be one-sided, but I can’t tell everyone else how THEY feel, because we ALL see things on a different perspective. When people talk about situations they are in, naturally it is one-sided, because they are in the situation and you don’t ever really see the other people(s) sides until after they explain it. And I post this all at the peak of my anger to be honest. Because that is when my emotions are aware of exactly how they feel, I know just what I feel and how they make me seem and I’d rather NOT, not get help. If that makes any sense? I want help. I want people to tell me where I could be wrong in the situation, where I am right. How it could be fixed, if there is any “fixing” needed at all or even if I am plain out being “over-emotional.”
No, I don’t ALWAYS take criticism well, but what person really does, all the time? I am just seeking help for a very twisted relationship. And we have so many different situations I am desperate for someone’s insight.
a) Sam’s jealousy with Glenn and I being together, and ever having conversations without her.
b) Glenn’s distrust in both Sam and I and his accusatory ways of assuming I have “feelings” for friends of mine because they have things for me.
c) My feeling left out. With them being married, I naturally feel left out because I was thrown into the mix, 2 months before they celebrated their 1 year marriage anniversary and 4 months before they celebrated the 3 year relationship.
d) The “baby” issue. With my not being able to have the opportunity to have a baby, the emotions run high because Sam is pregnant, and I am having to cope with my miscarriage 5 months ago and not having a chance to have my own family.
e) The issue of Sam’s infidelity and Glenn trying to work to fix his “marriage” which leaves me suffering. When they work on that, I am going to be jealous and I will get cranky. I can do it, and I will because I love them. But does it mean my emotions don’t matter or do I really have to “suck-up” and let them work it out and be emotionally numb.
f) Quality time being shot. They seem to think I am making it all about me. And I think I am TRYING to make it all about them. I am concerned for their marriage but as well I have to think of where I am going when it comes down to it. So, they both have needed to take care of me because I was in the E.R. twice last week so they were unable to get quality time, anniversary time, fixing the marriage time. Or even Glenn’s personal time that he says he needs. I don’t get much time with Glenn, or Sam, or both. With their work, and my schooling, we don’t get much time together. Truthfully, I see Jocelynn more than I see them.
Those are only some of the issues we are trying to deal with. For the sake of them, what am I doing wrong? But really, what can I do to help with ANY of the situations?