Originally Posted by Sereia
Thanks for the welcoming words! ...
really - the only thing we can count on is change...
I like the 'real girl' comment JaneQ...
At first he was saying he didn't want a 'relationship', that this was very temporary and he was sure polyamoury was not going to be for him. (that was 6 months ago lol) about 2 months ago he was saying he's pretty sure he *does want to be poly and that any new relationship was probably going to have to be ok with that. He also started actually calling this a relationship and talking about how well it is working. He also just broke up with a girl who did want to be his one and only - in part because he just wasn't sure if he wanted to be with her, in part because she wasn't cool with poly and in part because she wasn't cool with me. So who knows. . .
The fact is that, really, NOBODY KNOWS...we may feel one way today and another way tomorrow...Dude could meet someone tomorrow that rocks his world and wants to be monogamous, then HE would have to make a decision...in truth, so could MrS...of course, tomorrow I could be hit by a bus making all of these options moot.
Here, TODAY, is what I have, so I should enjoy it as well as I can...I can plan for tomorrow (which I do) but that doesn't meant that tomorrow will look as I expect. (Which DOESN'T mean that I can make contingency plans, just that my contingency plans need contingency plans...I'm a little type-A in case you didn't notice.)
I am responsible for MY decisions/behaviors...I have to trust my friends/lovers/partners that THEY are monitoring THEIR decisions/behaviors (which I DO, or they wouldn't be my friends/lovers/partners - although I have a tendency to want to "monitor" their interactions to make sure that they don't get hurt - this is MY issue).