As others have said, it sounds like she did just as you requested. You two had talked about the possibility before the party and you said just to let you know if something happens, which she did.
I actually see more of a possibility of your wife being bothered by your actions if you asked her for permission at the party when she was already intoxicated (this wasn't clear from your wording), vs waiting until a later time when you're both sober and able to discuss it with full faculties.
I wouldn't excuse anything based on someone haven't been intoxicated, unless they'd been drugged by someone else. Intoxication doesn't excuse actions, if anything it makes the guilt that much worse, as with drunk driving. That said, it doesn't seem like your wife is guilty of anything in this regard, it sounds like she did just as you asked.