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Old 01-17-2013, 11:04 PM
RockerChick RockerChick is offline
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Lancaster, PA
Posts: 17
Default What is alone time for, anyway?

Ok, I have a new issue that I have no idea how to handle.

(Hopefully, this links to my first post about my triad here.)

Michael, my new boyfriend and close friend of Danny, my husband, has asked me for our first "alone time" overnight this weekend. In the past, it has always been both Danny and I visiting Michael's house, and I might go spend a few hours alone with Michael (with Danny's blessing, of course). Michael is now requesting that I come alone for one overnight stay.

I understand his request. He's into the NRE, and all mushy. (So am I, really, but I'm trying to keep sane here!) Though there's nothing we can't do when Danny IS around, maybe Michael feels uncomfortable being mushy around Danny?

As I'm typing this, I'm starting to wonder what it is that alone time gives a couple who claim to be poly? Sure, it's romantic, but how much of it is selfishness? What are we doing that someone else shouldn't see? WHY does it need to be "private"?

Danny says he's okay with the overnight, but not thrilled. He says he sees it as his two friends needing to be "without him." That certainly isn't true in my case because I love having Danny around. It's why I married him! So it's really Michael that wants the alone time, and that makes me think he's moving away from poly and feeling this is more a one-on-one ONLY kinda thing.

I don't know -- I'm too close to this to see clearly, so this is why I'm asking all of you! What do you think is going on, and am I missing anything?

Thanks in advance!
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