Can you be more specific about what problems and challenges you're facing that you need help and advice in addressing?
There are lots of threads here for people who are secondaries in a triad and how they navigated those waters. It will be different for everyone of course, but you might find some things to think about.
“As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.” —bisexualbaker