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Old 01-12-2013, 03:15 PM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Pennsyl-tucky
Posts: 1,616

I wrote about the first time I told Dude that I loved him in this thread: OMG! I just said the "L" word.. I talk some about why I am so hesitant to use that phrase casually and other people chimed in with their experiences as well.

Originally Posted by WhatHappened View Post
I tell myself actions speak louder than words, and I know it's very easy to talk about love without meaning a word of it, so saying it, in a way, is meaningless; yet it does leave me wondering what really goes on in his mind and heart and what this really means to him.
This reminds me of a conversation I had with Dude early in our relationship (before the "L" word). We were in Home Depot shopping for something for a project on the house and chatting randomly and he comes out with something along the lines of "You really do WANT me here, don't you?"...I stopped dead in my tracks..."Really? I rarely let people into my home to even visit and you have been LIVING WITH US for 6 months and you doubt that I WANT you here?!" He said that, sure, our ACTIONS said that we wanted him here, but that sometimes words are louder because you say them "out loud."

Now we allude to this conversation whenever he is in need of some "verbal reassurance" (since apparently this is something that I don't supply routinely). He'll sidle up to me and say "You know, words are louder..."

Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" V-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (24+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (5+ yrs) and MrS's BFF
SLeW: platonic girlfriend and BFF
Lotus: "it's complicated"
+ "others" = FBs, FWBs, lover-friends, platonic G/BFs, boytoys, etc.

My poly blogs here:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe
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