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Old 01-07-2013, 06:42 PM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,131
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Quote:
And yes, people were putting us on the defensive. With the very first response to this, I had to defend that my wife is in fact her own person, and defend that we are not uncomfortable in addressing ourselves as 'we". I didn't mention anything at all about having threesomes, but then have to defend on that. Now we're finding we have to defend why we will only ever have one account; a point which was already explained but we nevertheless have to defend it anyway.
There was no accusation that your wife is not own person. In fact, both responses explicitly stated that your wife is her own person. Why would you interpret that as us saying exactly the opposite??

How is this forum "forcing" you to be defensive? One person said something that could be taken as abrasive. I agree, her post made assumptions that had no basis in your words. But that's one person, and no single person speaks on behalf of the entire group. Then I responded to her comment by pointing out that you said nothing about threesomes. You seem to have ignored my attempt to help you, but that's cool, I won't take it personally.

Is it possible that you're reading our words through tinted lenses? Have you received hurtful comments about your lifestyle in the past or on non-poly-friendly forums, and you're reading those comments in between the lines of our own, when such is not intended?

You say you're not looking for help with the bump, and that you're here for knowledge and discussion. That's all we're trying to do. But if not the bump, then you haven't given us much fodder for discussion. What was your intention in posting your introduction? If just to say "hi" then that's fine, just let us know that you don't have any specific questions right now, and we'll stop wasting our time on someone who doesn't want our help.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SnC View Post
As for my wife creating an account; she doesn't want to. As we've always done, she's always in the loop and prefers that I do the typing.
Actually, folks, I'm siding with SnC on this one. The policy refers to a different situation, wherein two people login separately to the same account and use the first-person-singular to refer to different people in different posts.

Quote:
Originally Posted by AutumnalTone View Post
That can make for some awkward discussions as the person posting under a username changes from post to post... we want all accounts to be used by a single person.
It's now explicitly clear that the husband is always the one at the keyboard, i.e. "using" the account. He speaks on behalf of his wife by referring to her in the third-person-singular. There's no confusion.

If you're going to harp about policy, make sure you fully understand it first...
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Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
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