Hooboy. Ok, I didn't come here to be on the defensive.
My wife and I are extremely close. We are "we", and she is a million times happy with that. It doesn't make her less of her own person. I don't control her, nor she me. We are completely honest and open with each other in every respect, madly in love with each other, utterly devoted to each other, and adore making each other happy. Neither of us is even the slightest bit uncomfortable with the use of 'we' to describe each other in our relationship.
As for being poly not meaning having threesomes; I respectfully beg to differ. We refuse to be constrained by labels. If my wife and I choose to have emotional relationships with other people, and those people are comfortable with sharing physical intimacy with one of us and the other being there as well, a label doesn't preclude that.
My wife and I are a team. We do things on our own, but we're always a team. We share things, discuss things, help each other as much as we can, revel in each other's successes and comfort each other in our failings. If either of us is to develop an emotional relationship with someone else, then 'we' need to both be comfortable with that or it is a non-starter. It's not about control, or anything the like. Free? Absolutely. We've both made the free choice to actively walk together in whatever we do, and that includes potentially moving towards having emotional relationships with people other than each other.
We're not looking for advice about the 'bump' we've hit in the road. I didn't mean to suggest we were. The 'bump' made us realize that we need to better equip ourselves for being poly if we're going to do that. We equipped ourselves very well before we got into swinging. We've gone about it backwards with poly, and we're here to correct that; to educate ourselves and gain a better understanding.
As for any 'needs'; there isn't a need. My wife and I have discussed what we think we would like our relationship(s) to be, and over time we've become more and more comfortable with the idea of being in a poly triad.
As for my wife creating an account; she doesn't want to. As we've always done, she's always in the loop and prefers that I do the typing.