I've been thinking today about the idea of addiction. There's a strong history of it on my father's side. Thankfully, I've never developed an addiction to drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes, but I do find that addictive tendencies plague me. I often feel addicted to procrastination and distraction, I get behind at work and lose sleep for the stupidest reasons. It's a detriment to my life that I feel only a limited amount of control over. I'm trying hard to become aware of it and fight it, and it's an ongoing battle.
Similarly, maybe I really am addicted to Gia, in a way. Well, not addicted to *her* exactly, but addicted to thinking about her and obsessing over our relationship, addicted to her attention. I'm thinking that I'd be better off spending my mental energy elsewhere. Not ceasing to think of her altogether, by ANY means, but just... like Rory and I were talking about above, not ruminating, at the very least. Just focusing more on other things. I'm going to try to direct my thoughts away from her more often, not to obsess. We'll see how it goes.
The major players. Me, 30ish bi female. Gia, girlfriend of 4+ years. Clay, boyfriend/dom. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eddie, roommate & fwb.
The supporting cast. Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler. Dexter, Gia's lover. Helen, Eric's lover. Izzy and Nikki, Clay's partners. Liam, Eddie's husband.