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Old 01-02-2013, 09:17 PM
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Velvet Velvet is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 36
Default Poly, Loving It, but Still in the Closet about it

I've been reading around this forum and thought I would make an account in case I want to post on something.

I'm female, since around 2005 I have been in a V relationship with two men. My man Ave and I live together, he is completely monogamous and I am the only woman he has ever had a relationship with. BB and I have a long distance relationship, but no less intense because of time or distance.

What appeals most me about Polyamory is the possibilities.

I had always struggled with, once I was close to someone I wanted to be physically close to them as well as emotionally. Those kinda of thoughts get you labeled as a slut and a whore, even though I typically don't want a sexual relationship with my friends I love to cuddle, hug, and kiss my close friends. That is why Polyamory (once I discovered it) seemed like the only right choice for me. The idea of compersion, in particular, to be happy with your SO being with someone (anyone) else like friends or another lover has been a huge positive factor in my life. Other parts of Polyamory aren't necessarily part of my reason for choosing to define myself as Poly. But everyone has their own unique course with Poly and I think that is a good thing.

What I would really like to do in the next few years is come out to my family as being Poly. It's complicated, not because of Polyamory itself, but because I know my family doesn't approve of BB at all. That is a long story...but if you want the extremely short version it is because my man BB is my cousin. So I would have to come out both as Poly and deal with my family thinking our relationship is inappropriate...which it is not in my opinion. In fact, until I only hinted at my feelings for BB to my Mom I had no idea people even thought it was strange or wrong to like your cousin in that way. I was trying to hint at being Poly. So, yeah, complicated.

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Last edited by Velvet; 01-02-2013 at 09:24 PM. Reason: to make it a little better
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