What is the appropriate balance to strike so that you are managing your feelings effectively but not stuffing them?
J saw his partner, C, today. It was their first really sexually intimate date, and I was expecting everything to happen as it did. It still caused me some gut reactions of "Ack! Intimacy is being taken away from me!" (logically I of course disagree with this, but it was my gut reaction) Every time I imagine them having intimate, meaningful, emotionally charged sex, I feel a little heart sick.
J has been wonderfully sensitive in allowing me to express my emotions, within the context that that is all that I am doing. I am definitely not asking for any kind of behavior change, but I do feel the need to express how I feel and get emotional support from him.
How do I know if I am stuffing my feelings though? I suppose in the past I have known because I have had physical symptoms manifest (bad stomachaches, headaches, etc). I have had trouble sleeping the past couple of nights, and I am wondering if it is related to J & C's deepening intimacy.
Any thoughts or feedback? How do you manage your emotions when things cause such intense negative gut reactions for you?