Originally Posted by StitchwitchD
Over time, I gradually grew even closer to the guy friend, and we talked about sex a lot, flirted, but nothing could happen while I was married. I resented that restriction, especially since my ex would flirt with girls online in hopes of "getting us a girlfriend" but then would get jealous of my guy friend, insult him, etc. The whole experience made it clear that my husband only cared about what would benefit him, that he didn't give a flying rat's ass about my happiness, that he saw me as his possession and wanted to control me.
Once I came to the realization that she can't hold to that boundary. Now viewing it that I'm allowed to be with other women in our relationship it seems like an unfair agreement. I wasn't pursuing other women though which is where the feeling of suprise comes in.
I do care about her happiness and don't want to be controlling. However I'm also concerned about my own happiness.