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Old 12-30-2009, 10:40 PM
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Ravenesque Ravenesque is offline
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Location: New York
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Originally Posted by Ceoli View Post
THIS! The part I bolded is one of the hardest concepts for people who don't experience the margins to understand. That was just worded so beautifully I'm going to have to steal that.
You can take it. It's under an attribution share-alike license. Just kidding.

Originally Posted by Ceoli View Post
I agree with this entirely. When we create an orthodox or a new normative paradigm, we're merely shifting where the weight of the oppression is lying, not undoing that oppression. We end up having to change our own definitions to fit the more normative ones, which doesn't really accomplish understanding. An this is why I find it more useful to reclaim terms for our own experiences. While the intent of conversations like this may be to build bridges of communication, the effect is trying to make a non-mainstream identity to conform to a more mainstream one and that causes problems all around.

Damn, I'm glad you're here!
I agree with all that you wrote as well especially the above.

Originally Posted by lovefromgirl View Post
Actually, grok's gone mainstream, or at least it was in 2003 when I first heard of it. Context? A trivia bowl question which had nothing to do with polyamory except that Heinlein came up with the term.
I should have known it would filter in through other geeky ones like me lol. Sci fi always does that. May The Force Be With You. But then some wouldn't say sci fi and its fandom are... normative and mainstream.

Originally Posted by lovefromgirl View Post
Exactly. I believe I saw a poster somewhere on here propose that civil unions be what determine rights, not marriage, which for many carries religious associations. To me, comparison of marriage to handfasting yields far more similarities than comparison of marriage to a civil union.

If I didn't see that on here, well, I still think it's a valid idea.
Where I would be concerned here is whether civil unions are being given as a method to separate privileges once again. Marriage affords these privileges and civil unions don't. Then equality has not been given.

Originally Posted by lovefromgirl View Post
Do you one better, even: not only have I not read Heinlein (hey, I got that trivia question wrong), I've not read The Ethical Slut or Opening Up. Cue gasps of heresy?

-- the girl who's pretty sure Krauthammer's the most liberal conservative she's ever seen
*laughs* I certainly wouldn't burn you. These texts give perspectives poly people agree with or don't agree with. And I have a transcendentalist perspective in addition to my existentialist ones.

I haven't finished The Ethical Slut *gasps* and I'm not worried hehe. I do love Opening Up though.

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