Originally Posted by Cleo
My husband sucks at this too. After living with him for almost 20 years, I think I am almost at the point where I no longer expect him to pat me on the back and say 'shush I'm here for you'.
He has accepted that I respond to stress with emotional flooding instead of with logic and practical solutions, much longer ago
I'm not sure which of us changed, or if it's just more noticeable now that we have other people in our lives. We've been married 21 years and you'd think we would have figured this out by now. I think having a girlfriend who has a very similar style of conflict resolution to him has changed how he reacts to me, with my very different personality. I also think that having my boyfriend who reacts very similar to me has changed how I react to my husband a little bit. I think we're in the midst of rediscovering how to balance what each of us need from the other while having partners that are similar to us in so many ways, if that makes sense.