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Old 12-30-2009, 07:44 PM
faraday faraday is offline
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 40

Yes. But... hmmm. Well she is already dating this other woman. They have been dating for months and they live in the same city while my boyfriend and I do not. I am addressing my feelings but my dislike of this woman isn't enough for me to ask that my girlfriend stops dating her. I don't know her this new woman well enough to say for sure that I don't want her to be a part of our lives and I want my girlfriend to feel free to date whomever she wants. I’m in charge of my emotions. And I really don’t want her to stop seeing someone she cares about and be alone in this new city she is in.

I am not on board with her moving in. But that hasn’t been asked. And I feel like if my girlfriend wants to have relationship where I or her boyfriend are less involved she can. Like I said I don’t NEED to love everyone she is dating but it is the goal. And obviously my like or dislike of a person is going to have an effect on how much that person is in my life.

I know the issue is MY issue to deal with and I don’t need my girlfriend to change her life and her relationship to make it easier on me. It’s hard but we’ve been though worse. And I deeply believe that part of doing this whole thing is about pushing yourself and your boundaries. If I thought that my struggle was negatively impacting my relationships or my health then I would ask for her to slow down. But really all it is doing is making me uncomfortable, and my partners are uncomfortable for me all the time. I drag them to boring parties; make them watch bad TV, ask them to deal with my new partners. Being open isn’t about comfortable, so I feel safe in pushing this and trying to figure out what the hell is going on inside my head.
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