I'm not going to be in the habit of multiple postings, but -- in the interest of inspiring conversation --, I'd like to say just a little more ... some words conveying some of the shape of what I want to enquire into.
In recent days/months/years I've noticed that I have a tendency to frame intimacy in such a way that sets me apart from people who frame it quite differently. This difference is oftentimes most obvious to me in relation to sexuality. My tendency to frame my own sexuality *as* a particular mode or expression of "intimacy" (as I tend to frame "intimacy") is oftentimes not the same framing others are providing (for themselves, with others).
Many people engage, for example, in "casual sex" with people whom they have no desire to explore or express "intimacy" (as I tend to frame it). And I have often wondered "where I am at" with the outward appearance of "casual sex". The outward appearance of "casual sex" is what the bodies are doing and ..., basically, for how long -- in the sense of whether they repeat the event, how often.... But I've concluded that it is the inward experience and attitude that's crucial for me, not the duration or repetition of the connection or association. Quality is, here, more crucial than quantity.
[The example of "casual sex" is intended only to mark a far end of one of several kinds in a spectrum, as I shall indicate over time.]
Okay, this should be enough for now. I could go on, but this is intended to be a conversation!