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Old 12-28-2012, 10:00 AM
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Anneintherain Anneintherain is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Seattle-ish
Posts: 826

That is awesome, my mom is a swinger and she really just didn't get how it was "safe" to be open other than that, even though her and her husband were very close friends with a number of their swing partners - I can see how not knowing the options can make you feel differently about polyamory, I certainly didn't even know it existed when my ex and I decided to change from being monogamous.

If "Opening Up" doesn't resonate with you or her, don't be afraid to seek other resources on the books/website recommendations, you should find something that at least fits with one of your guys' ideas about what you want. I really hope you find common language with her, it hopefully will ..hrm...settle her too so she trusts you are listening instead of panicking that you don't understand what she wants (when maybe she doesn't even know what it is yet) and gives her an anchor for these discussions too so she doesn't act rashly.
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
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