Well, you could call them up after holidays to give an opportunity to talk it out once feelings have had a chance to settle down.
Then you could ALSO consider how would you like to be treated in future? Whether in this polyship or a new one.
Maybe you don't want to get sexual / sexual again before laying your expectations, preferences, and boundaries out to your polyship people first?
Here's what I gathered from your post:
- How to deal with feelings like jealousy in this polyship?
- How to deal with conflict resolution?
- How you prefer the polyship ends, when that time comes?
- How you prefer to be broken up with (face to face, after all have had chance to discuss) and not by text.
- That you do not want to take spouses from each other and want to be there as an addition, not replacement.
- That you have no desire for marriage or kids.
- That you don't mind being a secondary right now, but would like to be equals in the far future and be working toward co-primaryship type of open model.
Is there anything else you would add to that? What would they add? What are their concerns?