Thread: My name is Jess
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Old 12-24-2012, 06:25 PM
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Diabolika Diabolika is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Indiana
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Thank you for your reply..

This man means a lot to me, on so many levels. He's been a very dear friend for 6 years now, and that is what I have decided to focus on. We both agree that now is not a good time to pursue anything more, and each of us has a broad range of reasons why. My polyamorous mindset is not the least of these matters, but also not the worst of them.

I have spent considerable time reading the forum, I have learned so much. I told him to come here and do some reading himself, if he wanted to see first hand how my mind works. We have come to the agreement that we'll put things on a shelf for a while. I'll be working hard for the next year and a half to make something of my life and myself, and the job I just secured will make it nearly impossible for us to continue to see each other anyway.

I know what I feel for him. It doesn't scare me to walk away from it now, because I know it won't change. I'll always be here for him. In the meantime I just hope someone doesn't claim him unless they can understand him and love him for what he is, instead of what he has built or what he can do for them. If he's happy, I'll be happy. If he's less than thrilled when I show up on his doorstep in a few years time... Oooh, if he doesn't find someone to make him happy, I know I will, if that day ever comes. I find it will be easy for me to be the friend I've always been. Platonic is something I can return to, the only issue I've ever had with this is keeping affectionate gestures to myself when otherwise they'd be second nature.

Thank you for the welcome. I'll be popping in occasionally on the boards, but more than likely I'll be reading more than piping up.
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