I just want *that* one
“I just want *that* one.”
This was said in a conversation this month with my husband of nearly 10 years, as we were discussing our trip-and-fall into the poly discussion. I was saying that all the poly discussions, even the use of the word, really, send me reeling a bit because I don’t really feel like one of y’all…mainly because I don’t want to start dating “other people” or “exploring” or whatever. I’m married to a great guy and I just want this one, specific girl, in a very limited way.
Simple story? Boy meets girl, boy and girl become best friends, boy and girl fall in love, get married have great sex, crazy kids and insane but intensely satisfying life. 5 years later, girl realizes she like girls, to a degree, and would probably have ended up dating one or two if she hadn’t been raised by 700 Club weirdos. Girl tells boy, boy is kind and understanding. 4 years pass. Girl has new “best” friend, second only to awesome relationship with boy. Let’s call her “cute-girl.” Girl develops crush on cute-girl after long period of friendship, freaks out a bit, and tells boy expecting boy to lose his shit. He responds in mature and adult way. Girl then tells cute-girl, who is actively both bi- and poly, expecting her to give simple straight-forward answer. Disaster unfolds as cute-girl cannot piece together if she even likes girl, but admits of having thought about kissing her, the two do not share a vocabulary or even most basic views on how the world works (girl is very linear, cute-girl thinks in paisley).
So, yeah. Um…I’m here and a little confused and scared. She’s full of impossible nonsense, he’s supportive past the point where I have interests but is as new as I am, and I don’t know what I’m doing. Like I said though…I don’t really want “other people.” I just want my husband and “that one.”