Oh Jools... do we have the same mother?!
From reading some of your previous posts i think we might, lol
or at least if i did have a child i am pretty certian my own mother would do exactly the same.
Does he really have to move in? Can he not move into a roommate situation? or on his own until the family settles? Geezuz, I'm scared for you. When parents start talking like that it's SCARY not to mention crazy. My mum got all kinds of crazy notions in her head.
he doesn't HAVE to move in, there are other options, if i had kids he would not be moving in now. There is still NRE, but i am also self aware enough to think things through and come to a desision based on more than just the NRE feelings. It is very practical for us because we need usually have a lodger and would be looking for a new one anyway, and he will be saving a lot of money to stay here with us than he currently has to pay to stay where he is at, and money is tight these days.
We are out as poly and have been for long time so its not new my mum has known im poly for least a couple of years its the same debate with her over and over again
as far as everyone else friends, work of all 3 of us everyone knows we are poly and its fine, some people ask some stupid questions some say that they don't belive it can work but actually they can't do anything to hurt us,
but i do take ur concerns about him moving in seriously Redpepper because i am usually not the first to recomend people start living together, and its not something i take lightly at all. This is not something i view as only going to be romantic i expect a lot of challanges.
As for my Mum
i haven't spoken to her since christmas