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Old 12-19-2012, 06:03 PM
hellokitty hellokitty is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 49
Question Time management - especially with the holidays

How do you deal with it?

My parents want me to come over Xmas eve, my bf wants me to spend all of Xmas day with his family, and my Gf expects me home on Xmas as well. She is feeling especially needy because she doesn't really have a family to spend time with for holidays. It's always been a tradition for me to be with my bf on Xmas because it is the anniversary of our first date. Also his extended family always invites us all over for lunch that day.

The other issue is I am self employed - I don't get paid on salary. Xmas eve & day are two of the biggest days for business in my line of work. I wanted to fit in at least 2-4 hours of working time.

I have no idea how to manage scheduling all this! Not to mention my partners sure don't make it easy on me to do things without attaching strong emotions or guilt trips to every decision I try to reasonably make...

I can tell (whether they'd admit it or not) they'll see how I make my plans as "choosing" one over the other. If I am not snuggling up with them and falling asleep together on Xmas night it will be seen as a personal insult. Sigh.

It's so hard for me when they put me in this position and are so stubborn about it. To me, holidays aren't about the exact date but just a good excuse to make extra special time for loved ones, whether it be the exact day on the calendar or that same weekend.

I just feel like no matter what I do someone's going to get hurt and take it out on me either with over dramaticizing and saying things they don't mean about my feelings for them, or taking it out passive aggressively, or holding an internal grudge and unleashing it weeks later. :/
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