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Old 12-18-2012, 08:54 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 8,343

Well, inviting someone to have sex with your partner without any emotional or loving connection is treating her like a tool, I think, and that's just being open, not polyamorous. No wonder he answered the way he did - the way you presented it, he was basically handed an opportunity to "play with" a "toy" or object rather than develop a relationship with a person (yeah, lucky girl she is ). I guess, if you view her as your property to grant permission for others to use, to give away or not, then maybe you could consider yourself a tool.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:

Last edited by nycindie; 12-18-2012 at 08:56 PM.
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