1st thought : You seem to have impulse/control issues. You have all these ideas of what you want and don`t want, but the minute a situation comes up, they all get put on the back-burner for whatever you feel in a moment.
You attracted a guy who is the same. And married. And not to you.
Good luck with that.
Do you feel you have always had a problem sticking to your beliefs, or do you feel it might be something that started occuring once your 1st husband died ? Do you still have a lot of pain from that ?
Side note : Why do people snoop, but restrict themselves part way into snooping ? I never really understood that. It doesn't make you any better then the person who reads everything. lol. Really ? ..If you are going to be insecure and snoopy, just do it already, and own it.
Don't cop-out half way through, to try and look noble.
Edit to add : Sorry, forgot to answer the title question.
No, I do not think these are poly growing pains. This is the price paid for cheating. I don`t really judge people's reasons for cheating, but there really is always a price to pay for that behaviour. Many times the cheater is at a confused state of life, and the person loving them on the outside, is the guinea pig.
Last edited by SourGirl; 12-18-2012 at 03:24 PM.