Developments: Part 2
After dropping Chipmunk off at work I tell Airyn that I have something I want to go out and do while Chipmunk is at the Mall with her mom on Saturday. I tell him about it, about the times and such, and we agree we'll go after we drop off Chipmunk, I ask if he wants to bring Wolf, and tell him that I don't mind it'll be fun. Airyn tells me that Chipmunk wants to do some shopping before going to meet her mom, and he's asking if I'm ok with them getting up really early to go out (since it's my day). I tell him that's fine that I wasn't originally expecting to have any time Saturday, so I feel like it's a bonus. Friday night Airyn and I go out to dinner, come home take Wolf out to see Christmas lights, and then head home to nap. Airyn was up late, and I had worked all night so we were sleepy. Chipmunk gets off, comes home, and she and I do not have that conversation.
Saturday morning early, Chipmunk's mom cancels their plan, she briefly wakes Airyn telling him that they don't have to go out so early. Airyn just agrees and falls right back to sleep (he barely remembers). I wake up an hour or so later, and wake them up in time to take Chipmunk to the Mall, then I find out that's been canceled. Everyone gets up and Airyn and Chipmunk head to the kitchen for coffee makings. Airyn send Chipmunk into the bedroom to talk to me.
She and I have the conversation about her job, and about going out as a group. She tells me I should still be able to go to her job with Airyn, or with him and Wolf. I tell her about her being uncomfortable and how I didn't see that going anywhere good once her co-workers start talking behind her back about her involvement with a family man. She says it's not right that I won't go up there, so I tell her it was the only comfortable choice I had available. Then she talks about the not going out as a group thing (her and Airyn were getting ready to go out for their shopping trip). She's telling me that she doesn't want that, that she wants me to go out with them today, that to her it's separation, and that it's not good. I point out that I was again doing the only comfortable thing available to me. I agree to go out with the two of them, She making a couple stops that are of no interest to me, so I say those are her places, and that we can split the rest. It ends up being to nebulous for Airyn, but shopping trips were never the issue to begin with. However it is still a good exercise to see how this might work, and start fleshing out this idea. Sadly this experiment meant that Airyn and I did not get to go out just the two of us the to market art event I was interested in. I tell him that I'm disappointed, he asks when it's over and I tell him just before Chipmunk has to be to work.
We have a good evening, have some real quality time. Intimate, and tender, and full of love. He likes it when I place in hand at just the right spot for him to feel himself moving within me. After we hop in the shower for more cuddling. Then to the kitchen to make food stuffs. I'm making Mandelbrot (almond bread like biscotti), and then some Latke's. We are actually atheist, but celebrate Hanukkah with Wolf as my family is Jewish even if I've never participated in that religion. He tells me that Chipmunk and her mom are planning to have their mall outing on Sunday. I tell him that means we may get a few hours to ourselves again. I also pull up his spreadsheet to update how things actually went Friday and Saturday. I tell him that we need to make plans and stick to them. That I understand Chipmunk can't control her mom canceling things, but that this isn't the first time her mom has messed up plans. He agrees, but we put off talking more about it till later. Neither of us want to have an argument.
Sunday I talk more with Airyn (after we drop Chipmunk off for lunch with her family) about making plans and sticking to them. I'm helping him add next week to his spreadsheet, and we are getting some basic plans together. I tell him that we really need to stick to our plan, that this week ended up being no different from the previous weeks this month. That I get that Chipmunk can't control her mom's cancellations, and that she still wanted to do her shopping. I tell him going as a group was the right thing to do in this case. It's like giving Chipmunk a positive for finally being willing to talk to me about these things. I tell him that I could have said, "I'm sorry your mom canceled, and I know you want to shop; however, Airyn and I have plans and are going out shortly just us." But I didn't. I tell him he could have done the same thing, and that we could have promised to do the shopping thing on Sunday afternoon instead.
When Chipmunk gets home we find out that she is making plans to visit with her family for most of Friday, so that Airyn and I can still have our Friday even though she happens to have it off. I tell her about the plans I was making for Thursday (her other day off) to be out of the house and give them the majority of the day at home. Everything seems to be acceptable on either end, and couple time is showing to be evening out. At least till the dates get here.
I'm optimistic, but also afraid. I'm worried that this it temporary. Things are getting better between Airyn and I. We had a reasonable amount of alone time (half of which we were a sleep) on Friday. Saturday we really connected, and my confidence was running high so that I kissed him like we used to. He giggled afterwards, and I got all shyish and said he was laughing at me. He grinned and said we hadn't kissed like that in a long time. I just hugged him and said I know, and left it alone. Airyn and I are being more openly flirty with each other again, he's more interested in touch then he's been in months, and I feel better. Not whole, but better then I have in a long while. I told him this, that I've really enjoyed his company this weekend, and that I'm starting to feel better. A couple days is not a trend, nor does it repair months of neglect and rejections, but it is a beginning. I see good things being possible.
Married to my high school sweat heart (20 year relationship). Talked about Poly, but put the idea off and had a kid instead. Stumbled into an FFM (Vee) that became an FMF (Vee).
No longer dateing my husbands Girlfriend.
Airyn: My husband (Straight)
Chipmunk: My x-GF, My husbands GF (Straight)
Wolf: my Daughter with Airyn
Boots: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married
History: Social/Friend dating (Bi) Married